Adrian strips me down.

As rehearsals rolled along for 'Les Liaisons', I slowly but steadily became buddies with Brad Hennigan. He was always friendly, and went out of his way to say hi, or ask me over to a poker game at his brother and sister in law's place or something. Brad was one of the first people to see this one actress being really nasty to me in front of every one, and the first one to say, "P'shaw! Don't you worry your pretty little head about that. She'll get over it!"
I loved his warm, Texas drawl and his big, easy smile. There was something hugely comforting about Brad. Definitely the kind of man you want around if the world comes to an end. Or, if you've had a bad day.

My world was not coming to an end. In some ways, it felt like it was just beginning. This part, this kind of play - were EXACTLY why I had always wanted to be an actress.

So, when Adrian Hall was not happy with my big comedic scene, and decided to call me out on it in front of the whole cast, I was devastated.
We were getting pretty close to previews, and I had this big scene with Linda,that takes place the night after Cecile is robbed of her virginity by the sly and evil Valmont. I (Cecile) am confessing the whole terrible night to the very person who planned it and sent Valmont into action. It is the end of Cecile's world if anyone discovers that she has been unchaste before marraige - the best she can hope for is a life at a nunnery.

Adrian wanted me to cry while I was confessing this night to my beautiful confidant. And I thought I was crying alright - I wanted it to be real - but I was not pleasing my director. So Adrian called me out in front of everyone, and the crew.

"Well, you're just not GETTING it, darlin'! I don't know what I have to DO!" he said, frustrated.
He was standing in the middle of the orchestra, yelling up at me onstage.
"Come on down here to center stage. Front and center where we can all see you." he commanded. I did. "Now take your clothes of."
I looked at him, shocked. I didn't have nude scene in the play. What the heck?
"...umm...ALL of them?" I asked.
"YES!" Adrian barked, seemingly EXTREMELY annoyed. "Every last item - OFF!"
Yikes. Despite Peter's prank the previous spring, I was NOT comfortable with nudity. Not at ALL.
But I did it. Slowly, Akwardly.
"Well, damn it!" Adrian sputtered, "Hurry up, now, we don't have all day! Jesus H Christ, girl! Can't you do ANYTHING right? Take off your damn clothes! Are you STUPID or somethin'?"
He was YELLING at me - berating me - in front of everyone. As my clothes came off, and I stood there, stark naked, Adrian kept yelling at me, insulting me. He kept calling me "girl" as if it were a bad word.He did it until I broke down and started to cry. But he didn't stop there - he kept going until I was crying HARD. Sobbing.
"What are you doing NOW? CRYING? Like a little CRY BABY!!!????" he yelled, gesturing his arms wide, "So EVERYONE can see you BAWL? Everyone can se you BAWL like a little CRY BABY???!!! Nothing to protect you out there? Not even your DAMN CLOTHES, girl? I though I hired an ACTRESS - not a whiny little CRY BABY!"
I thought I was getting fired from the show. Which of course made me cry even harder. And , indeed, I felt completely unprotected. Completely vulnerable.
"Well, I want you to remember how this FEELS!" Adrian yelled up at me. "Cause THIS is what I want you to do EVERY DAMN NIGHT! In the damn scene! You are a FIFTEEN year old VIRGIN who's just been DESTROYED!! You GOT it??!!"
I nodded my head miserably, I sure did.
"Well, get your clothes on and do the damn scene. Do it RIGHT!"

So I did. I did the 'damn scene' - just like he wanted it. Bawling my head off. It was hilarious and heartbreaking at the same time. Just the way he knew it could be. Linda gave me some hand squeezes and some REAL looks of sympathy during the scene, which I took to mean, "Don't worry, honey. This is just how it is - we've all been there. You're not the only one he's ever singled out." But all she really SAID were her lines.
And when the scene was over, Adrian was as happy as a 5yr old boy on Christmas morning. He practically HOPPED out of his seat and out of his skin.
"That's IT!" he yelled at both of us. "That's EXACTLY right! Don't forget that! You are both brilliant actresses!! THAT'S how it's supposed to be! Let's go to lunch! I'm STARVING!"
Linda gave me a warm smile and a hug. And while my face was still nestled in her soft hair, she whispered, "It really did feel great. You did good, kid."

At lunch, I just lay on the grass, trying to recover and let the whole thing sink in. So when we were called back into rehearsal, I was starving. My stomach was growling and making horrible noises I was so hungry.

Backstage, Brad came in from his lunch, and walked quietly over to me. He didn't say a word about the humiliation. He just handed me a sandwich.