the best Los Feliz pub crawl.

I'm sitting down to my computer tonight with small glass of Baileys on the rocks. I can't even remember the last time I had Baileys. And it's shocking how sweet it is. Oh well, desert.

My 17 year old daughter is always asking, "Why don't we have any Baileys?"
To which I always reply disdainfully, "Why WOULD we have Baileys?"
And then she says, "Because it's DEEEELICIOUS!"
She's pretty adorable.
So, I was in the market - the Albertsons in Los Feliz to be exact - and I saw Baileys on sale, it's Christmas time, and I had to go there. Thanks, Sophie. Thanks for the sugar injection. If I crash half way through this posting, you'll know exactly why.

But, tonight I am inspired to write about an old fling of mine. We never got to boyfriend/girlfriend territory - and that's ok. Now, for those of you who think of me simply as a mother-type, or "Aunty Jennifer" who cooks for you, pays for Dorasita to come and clean up after the parties around here ( I help! - most of the time) - well, you might want to skip this one. Because the thing is - I AM actually a whole PERSON.I have my own adventures, and have been this whole time. You guys know about some of them. But not most of them. Don't forget - I was a mother when I was younger than ALL of you - even Tess - so I wasn't about to let motherhood get in the way of my adventures.

A few years ago, I was still in full swing as far as going out and partying with my friends. The biggest thing that has changed in these last years, is that none of my friends want to go OUT anymore. My brother turns into a pumpkin at 11 pm on the dot. My best girlfriend got married and moved to the suburbs. If I want to see her - to catch up - I have to drive 35 minutes out of the city for a 30 minute coffee catch up with her DOG and her. And everyone knows that people come second to dogs and babies. That's just a fact. Even my once game gay-husband has to be DRAGGED out these days - and that happens once every 3 or 4 months. I guess that's all ok. Adventures change. But I do miss going out dancing.

Anyway - a few years ago, I and a gang of friends were out on a Saturday night doing a pub crawl. The Los Feliz pub crawl - pretty much the same one as in the movie, 'Swingers'.We were at our second pub of the evening (still one of my favorite dive bars) Ye Rustic. Actually, it might actually be called Ye Rustic Inn - but there is NOTHING Inn-like about it. It's just an old-school down and dirty dive bar with really good buffalo wings, despite the fact that it periodically gets shut down by the health department.

I was looking cute. I was feeling cute. And that was a small miracle, because it wasn't long enough after a certain horrible relationship had ended for me to feel FULLY back on my emotional feet. And I was out with a GREAT group of friends - who I miss horribly, by the way. I think Paul was there, and Alex, Mieke, Peter and possibly Kathleen. Maybe a couple more people - it was a nice gang of us. We had a table - a much coveted table - in the back room. And there was another gang back there that seemed on a similar mission. Get drunk, walk around Los Feliz and get into some trouble - make some memories.

Two of the guys in that other merry group stood out for being sexy and adorable. One was a tall skinny guy who looked like he MIGHT be gay, and the other one was my (now) friend, Mc Cartney. That's not his real name, but I'm calling him that because he actually LOOKS a LITTLE like Paul Mc Cartney, and was a little obsessed with Paul,the Beatles, and Wings.
Mc Cartney sauntered up to me at the bar, as I was fetching drinks, with his devil may care attitude.
"So what are you doing here?"he said, as if it were clever.
"Uh...probably the same thing YOU are. DRINKING..."I said back, laughing. What was I supposed to say?
"Yea, good point." he said. "Sorry. That did sound a little bone-headed." He smiled and shook his head, then flashed his super boyish and charming smile at me.
"OOOoooo!" I thought, "Let the games begin!"

For the next 45 mins or so we took turns flirting with each other and checking in with our respective parties. Mc Cartney's opening line was NOT representative, it turns out. He was clever and witty. And funny, and self deprecating. And boy did I need that bit of flirtation.So when our parties left and went in two different directions, I was a little sad. But what are you going to do? He was too young for me, anyway.

My gang walked down the street to the Good Luck bar. One of my favorites. And one of Vince Vaughn's favorites, too. There he was. Casually chatting with a male friend, having some cocktails, his long, long legs stretched out from the low banquette against the wall - no big deal.

The Good Luck Bar is really cool because they brought almost the whole thing there from China, piece by piece. It feels like you're in an Indiana Jones movie set when you're in there - except the crowd is just TOTALLY normal. That's the difference between Los Feliz/Silverlake and Hollywood. Hollywood night spots are expensive and hard to get into if you're not famous, and all the girls look like Paris Hilton want-to-be s, and they are ALL too damn crowded. 30 minute bathroom lines - that nonsense. Twenty dollar drinks. Not MY idea of fun. Los Feliz and Silverlake, on the other hand are fun and full of hipsters.

So, after a couple more drinks at The Good Luck bar, my party decided we needed to go another block down to the strip joint, Cheetas. Normally, I would have gone home at that point. I don't like strip joints. They depress me. But this group of friends convinced me that Cheetas was different - and after all, we were having so much fun! Off to Cheetas! Arm in arm, singing loudly and obnoxiously, we bustled into this strip joint.

I can tell you this about Cheetas. The drinks are dirt cheap. And it's really small, and the girls get to choose their own music - so it really is a different kind of vibe on a certain level. But then again, it IS a strip club. And the thing that depresses me most about those places is the MEN that go there. It was the same on this night.OUR bunch was loud and silly and having fun, but the men who were already sitting there, looked like freakish lost souls to me. And they behaved that way as well. The moment I was by myself for 2 seconds, one of those depressing freaks started hitting on me in a really creepy, aggressive way. I looked around for my friends, but they were nowhere to be found. Out smoking, or in the bathroom or something. And just when I was thinking that things might be turning the corner into scary-land, a familiar face popped into my eye-line. It was the tall, cute guy from Ye Rustic.

"Do you need a rescue, Miss?" he said discreetly. I shook my head vehemently, 'yes'.
"Well, hello there." said another familiar voice as Mc Cartney slid into the seat next to me. "Fancy meeting you here."
"Hey!" said the creeper behind me with the neck tats, "this your boyfriend or what?"
I looked at Mc Cartney and took a chance. "yes!" I said, and whispered to my new friend, "Kiss me. Right now. Please."
And he did.

McCartney started off with the obligatory kiss that one might grant a damsel in distress, but it quickly turned into a REAL kiss. And then more real kisses, and somehow we were making out in Cheetas. Some practically naked girl grinding around the pole on the stage above us, all covered with tats and so many earings and nose rings and belly button rings to Prince's 'Purple Rain'. It was kind of awesome. I had never made out with a total stranger in strip club before.

The agro guy left me alone after that, and all of us continued our awesome pub night.I was introduced to the tall cutey - who turned out to be a talented improv comedian with his own show, who also worked with Drew Carey and some MAJOR comedy people. Mc Cartney and I continued to flirt with each other and mingle with our respective friends, and at one point I found myself in the bathroom with a bunch of the dancers. The two prettiest ones started flirting with me big time, and asked me if I wanted a lap dance. I didn't. Not unless it was from McCartney. But I was awfully flattered.

As we were all saying our goodnights outside of the club, McCartney took me aside from everyone else and pushed me up against the wall.He kissed me for real this time, and it made me weak in the knees. No joke. He was SUCH a great kisser.
"Are you going to give me your number?" he purred at me. I nodded 'yes'. Of COURSE I was going to give him my number!
"Thank you for pretending to be my boyfriend in there." I said.
"No problem at all....I'd like to pretend that again sometime." He put his hand on my rib cage and pulled me towards him, kissed me again. Looked into my eyes."Mmmm.." He said in parting.

And that is just the beginning of that story. But the cops are parked in front of my neighbor's house again - and Tyler is making a huge ruckus getting a ladder out of my garage - so I'll just have to finnish this later.