Peter's instant family.

Peter moved in with us that very first night. I don't remember any discussion about it - it just happened. The next day, while I was at rehearsal at 890 Broadway - right next to the 'Starlight Express' cast - Peter went to Brooklyn to get some of his clothes and things, and just moved right in.

It was wonderful to have him there. And so much happened during those crazy long and short three months - I'm sure I'll get the timing mixed up for lots of these little stories.

When Peter first moved in, we were an instant little family. I would go to rehearsal every day for the show, leaving Max with the wonderful Indian nanny that I had found. She was beautiful and patient and always thirsty. Her constant lecture to me was that I should drink more water. It must have sunk in - because I drink TONS of water now.
Peter would go off every day looking for union work on some new skyscraper going up. Come home with tales of crusty,older carpenters down at the union building that needed the work more than he did.
"What was I going to do?" he'd say, "Patrick has a family to feed. He's got THREE kids, for Christ's sake!" He would shake his head at the dismal state of things - work wise - and then he'd look at me and pull out a great big grin. "Awww...it'll get better in a week! Let's go out to dinner!"

And out to dinner we would go. I just took Max everywhere with us, and everywhere we took him, Max charmed the pants off of people. I kept a watchful eye on Peter the whole time. I was worried that he wouldn't want the trouble of being with a little kid, so I tried to never let that burden rest on his shoulders for even a moment. A couple of times, Max woke up in the middle of the night and Peter said, "I'll go. I don't have work tomorrow, and you do." But I never let him.

One sunny Saturday afternoon we went for a boat ride in Central Park. Max loved it. He'd been asking to go on those boats, and it was finally warm enough. We paddled out to the middle of the pond, waving at everybody, having a grand time. And just when we were trying to decide where to go next - the paddle boat started filling up with water at an alarming rate.
"We're sinking!" I exclaimed.
"Bail!" ordered Peter.
We looked around for something to bail the water out with, and all we had was one paper cup - from a fountain drink.
Max was delighted. We decided we'd better paddle for shore as fast as we could, with Max bailing water as fast as he could. By the time we got back to the little paddle boat place, our ship was halfway under water, and we were all soaking wet - especially Max. But it was a warm day, and we didn't care.As we were walking back to the apartment, a cute older couple stopped us.

"Oh what an adorable little boy." they said about Max. That was not uncommon. Then the older gentleman addressed Peter. "That's a beautiful little family you've got there." he said.
I turned beet red from embarasment. This is EXACTLY what I didn't need! Ugh. Peter would flee like a man on fire if people started saying things like that! Max's own father had...so why WOULDN'T a much younger and much less employed man? I tried to whip Max and myself into a pseudo hiding place behind a hot dog vendor. But I could hear Peter's response loud and clear.
"Why thank you. " he said, "Thank you very much."
Anyone could have said that out of politeness, but I turned right around in time to see Peter's face. He was beaming. Not angry or weird, like I thought he'd be - but beaming. Proud looking. As if we WERE his family, and he was so happy to show us off.
He looked right at me. "They are pretty beautiful, aren't they?"

With that simple gesture, Peter pulled off a layer of the protective wall I had guarding my heart. And he kept doing it. Just as Max's father had taught me to put those layers on - build those walls as if my heart were a fortress that needed to be protected, Peter took them away. One by one, I could feel the hurt peeling off. One by one, I could feel the wounds being filled up and healed with unabashed love. Not JUST for me - but for Max, too. And even though it was early in the game (as far as me being a mother) - I already knew down to my core that Max and I were one. We didn't come separately. We came as a package.

One time we took Max to the movies. I was hoping he would go to sleep in my arms, like he had done so many times at the movies. But he was getting a little old for that - and still too young to enjoy the movie. So I took him out to the lobby and let him run around. We went outside for a few minutes, too, just to change the scenery. I had left Peter in the movie theater with Max's stroller and our jackets and stuff. No reason for both of us to miss it.
When Max looked as though he were FINALLY getting sleepy, I snuck back into the theater, and sat in the back row - letting Max fall asleep on my shoulder. There were only a few minutes left of the movie.
The house lights went up, and I began to look for Peter. He was no-where to be found. Nor was the stroller, or our jackets, or anything. I hoisted Max further up on my shoulder and went into the lobby to look for Peter. No Peter. I asked one of the ushers to look in the men's room. No Peter. Back into the theater - he was nowhere!

I got ready to walk the many, many cold blocks back to my apartment with a heavy toddler on my shoulder. I was worried that he would get really cold on the way. But what else to do? My bag was with Peter, too - so - no cab fare. I walked about half a block down the street when I heard his voice behind us.
"Jennifer! Jennifer! Wait up!"he called as he ran up to us with the stroller and all our crap piled on top of it. "I was so worried! Where WERE you guys!!??" he said.

My initial instinct to be annoyed with him (HE had disappeared after all, not me)was instantly flushed away by the worried look on his face. Peter did not have much of a filter.At Interlochen, I would have said he had none. And that same quality that I found so annoying and young a couple of years before, turned out to be one of the best things about him.
He had been so concerned about us, that he'd spent almost the whole movie looking for us - we'd been going in circles.

If I had any doubt remaining about Peter, or how he felt about BOTH of us, it was gone now. It was gone after seeing that look on his face, and hearing all the way home how worried he'd been that something bad had really happened to us.

At home,we put Max to bed, ate cold chinese noodles right out of the fridge, and made plans to take Max on the ferry the next day (for a quarter a piece) and check out the Statue of Liberty.
As we snuggled into bed, and Peter put his strong arms around me he said, "I don't know what I'd do if anything happened to you guys. You know that, don't you?"
I nodded my head "yes", and tried not to let him feel the tears that were running down my cheek.